Suggestion
Note to dream self: Girl, don't even think about taking those hash...cookie...sandwich...things to work with you. It might seem like a funny idea now, but you just know it'll all end in tears.
Question
In the manner of a heavy-handed off-Broadway play: I walk onstage, wearing a housecoat with two buttons missing. I hold my coconuts aloft and I shout: "What should I do with these coconuts? What -- do -- you" [I point and glare at audience] "want -- me -- to -- do??" I drop the coconuts and whisper, "I have always been terrified of coconuts. The menacing bristly skin, the milk that is not milk, the only fruit you need a hammer to open. If life hands me coconuts, must I make lemonade? And, if so, do you know of any good recipes?"
Statement
Murray is *thump* without a doubt *Prrrrow?* the world's most effective alarm clock *smash*.
Lament
Why must he always go for me? Never Josh?
How about hash-coconut cream pie?
Posted by: EV at August 27, 2003 10:50 AMMurray goes for you, because he knows you need to get up and I don't. He also knows that I'm the one who actually gets up when the alarm clock goes off, not the one who needs a Murray and a Josh to "help" get them out of bed.
That said, I'm sure he also does it 'cause that's the time of day when he most wants your love and affection -- or he just wants you to get out of bed and dispense his daily allotment of juicy crack.
How about we make Murray a pair of coconut bras? I think we both know he'll be needing them shortly, if not already. Cats shouldn't have cleavage... no sir!
Posted by: Josh at August 27, 2003 12:30 PM