-On my next job search, the freedom to skip over any listing that includes "ability to multitask" among its requirements.
-All new underwear.
-A space to throw parties where the guests do not need to navigate desks, computer equipment, music gear and litter boxes.
-An air conditioner that does not smell like cat pee.*
-Midafternoon naps.
-A bottomless Amazon gift certificate.
*To give the devil his due, this is one of the few domestic crises that cannot be blamed on Murray. Say what you will about him, his litter box etiquette is above reproach.
Posted by hilatron at August 22, 2003 12:31 PM | TrackBackI think you forgot brand new socks on this list. Your feet will thank you later.
Oh, and if you are a big fan of afternoon naps, I understand that Thailand is really into that sort of thing. I had a friend who lived there for a few years who said that noon-two was his favorite time of day because of that.
Posted by: Andy at August 22, 2003 12:59 PMThe Myth of Multitasking
It’s time for a movement: workers of the world unite! Kill multitasking! Terminate the term, cancel the concept, destroy the demand, erase the expectation, murder the myth, immolate the idea, nix the notion, and don’t go there any more.
All multitasking actually consists of is the insidious effort to have one person do more than one job. First Globo-Mart downsizes the staff – from 3,000 people to 2,000, say, and then they assign the missing people’s tasks to the craven remnant. Presto! Survivors, out of guilt, fear and relief, now do 50% more work at no more pay, and Globo-Mart’s stock shoots up faster than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs and the CEO rakes in the rewards.
Meanwhile, the quality of the services and/or products plummets. But who cares? Consumers have no power any more; they’re too exhausted from juggling multitasking at their day jobs to even notice that the cheesy overpriced crap they lug home from Globo-Mart barely works. Only the Dow Jones box score counts for anything these days.
The human brain is not configured for multitasking. We are not supposed to be able to do two or three things at once and do them well. We really shouldn’t be able to read our email and listen to our voice mail while filling out staff schedules for the coming week Not only is this alleged ability unnatural, it doesn’t actually exist. Important info goes missing. Mistakes get made. Crises occur. Next thing you know, it’s time for more downsizing because customers desert in droves in response to the shoddy service, shabby treatment, and shitty products.
Workers of the world, unite behind the banner of One Thing At A Time! Who know? If we all steadfastly refuse to do more than can humanly or robotly be done well and efficiently, we might be able to re-employ all the poor shmoes who have lost their jobs since The Shrub grafted his kudzu-like way into the Rose Garden.
Stamp out multitasking! Stop robbing your neighbors of their cubicles and joblets!
Posted by: Doombot at August 22, 2003 06:55 PMAmen.
Posted by: Hilatron at August 22, 2003 07:15 PMmmm, all new underwear...
Posted by: EV at August 22, 2003 09:31 PMHnh. What do you want from Globo-Ma--, er, Amazon?
Posted by: Doombot at August 23, 2003 09:59 AMEverything. I have a big media yen at the moment. It'll pass, though. And the Brookline Public Library is very nice.
Posted by: Hilatron at August 23, 2003 10:33 AM