Welcome to your Guide, Middle Manager! Here you will find a list of the questions you will need to ask your potential Stop & Shop bagger in order to determine if he or she is ready to represent Stop & Shop in his or her duties, and a brief series of bagging exercises to help you determine his or her bagging skill level. Also included are sample responses. As you interview your subject, circle the answer that most resembles his or hers, and then use the handy scoring section at the end of the test to see if you should hire him or her. It's just like Cosmo!
QUESTION 1: As a bagger, you will interact with people all day long. Do you consider yourself a "people person?"
Answer A: Wow, sure! I love to talk to people, try to find out what they need, and give it to them!"
Answer B: Um, I don't mind people, I guess.
Answer C: *Incoherent grunting*
QUESTION 2: Here at Stop & Shop, we sell some things that are heavy, such as large bottles of soda and tubs of kitty litter. How will you react when someone sends these items down your line?
Answer A: I understand that, as a grocery bagger, handling whatever items the store sells is part of my job. If a customer purchases something I can't lift, it would be the work of a moment to call over one of the many teenage boys in uniform who seem to lurk around the registers all day hitting on the cute cashiers, and get him to help out. That would be no problem at all!
Answer B: *Sigh* If someone is going to buy that shit, I'll have to deal with it. *Slouch*
Answer C: Grrrr! Hisssssss!
QUESTION 3: Please demonstrate how you will ask customers what their preferred method of bagging is.
Answer A: "Would you like paper or plastic, sir or madam?"
Answer B: "Paper or plastic?"
Answer C: "PAY-PLAH! PAY-PLAH! PAY-PLAH!"
EXERCISE 1: Have your subject bag the following items: two bottles of soda, five cans of vegetables, two boxes of crackers.
Response A: Two double bags. One contains: one bottle of soda, three cans of vegetables. The other contains: one bottle of soda, two cans of vegetables, two boxes of crackers.
Response B: One double bag containing all the items.
Response C: Two single bags, one of them with a broken handle. One contains: two bottles of soda, four cans of vegetables, and one box of crackers. The other contains: One can of vegetables, one box of crackers.
EXERCISE 2: Have your subject bag the following items: two jugs of soy milk, one bottle of soda, six cans of vegetables, a box of cereal, and a loaf of bread.
Response A: Three bags. One contains: two jugs of soy milk. The second contains: one bottle of soda and one box of cereal. The third contains: six cans of vegetables on the bottom with the loaf of bread laid on top.
Response B: Two bags. One contains: two jugs of soy milk, one bottle of soda, and six cans of vegetables. The other contains: one box of cereal and a loaf of bread.
Response C: Two bags. One contains: six cans of vegetables. The other contains: a loaf of bread laid across the bottom, two jugs of soy milk on one side of it, the box of cereal on the other side of it, and the soda outside the cereal.
EXERCISE 3: Have your subject bag the following items: A produce bag containing six apples.
Response A: *The subject places the apples gently into a bag, and sets the bag gently into the grocery cart.*
Response B: *The subject tosses the apples into a bag, rips the bag off the stand, and lets them drop onto the counter.*
Response C: Apples?! I hate apples! *The subject picks up bag by the wrong end, scatters apples all over the counter, picks them up and throws them onto the floor, stomps on them, picks them back up, spits on them, insults their mother, throws them into a bag, and chucks the bag out the door into the parking lot.*
SCORING GUIDE
Mostly A Answers: Avoid hiring this type. They're likely to be go-getters, and the next thing you know, you'll have to give them a raise or something.
Mostly B Answers: Borderline. Keep an eye out for symptoms of independent thought; if the subject seems to have poor self-esteem and a general sense of overwhelming ennui, they're probably okay.
Mostly C Answers: This is your perfect bagger! They're too poorly socialized to ever kowtow to silly customer demands for service, and the chances of them moving on to a better job, or ever aspiring to move up the chain of command, are extremely slim. Good work!
Posted by hilatron at March 12, 2003 12:51 PMField agent aaron reporting for duty, Hilatron. It is my findings through research at such competing supermarkets as: Market Basket, Star, and Shaw's, that the same hiring practices hold true at all of them.
HOWEVER!!!!
There is a light at the end of the tunnel, and that light is VICTORY SUPERMARKET!!!! Where I get the impression that the baggers are not only semi-literate, but have adequate spatial-relations ability and enough knowledge of basic physics that they will be able to get most of your items into bagging scenarios that actually almost make sense.
Posted by: aaron at March 13, 2003 09:10 AMDitto Trader Joes (whose $2.99 a bottle wine you have already praised here - give it up, Charles Shaw!), though you'd think having to wear those Hawaiian shirts would make them cranky like hell.
Posted by: Agent Courtney at March 13, 2003 09:58 AMI have a ball hitch on the car, hook the cart right up, bypassing the bagger all together.
Thanks for the link yo.
Cheers.
Posted by: J.R. at March 13, 2003 12:12 PMI've always found they generally bag the 2L soda bottles in a separate double bag. As with the bags of milk.
Posted by: Punz at March 13, 2003 09:07 PMaaron: Just as I suspected, the grocery store cabal holds firm even across company lines. This "Victory" supermarket better watch their backs.
Agent Courtney: perhaps they drink the wine all day?
Punz: But then what do they use to pulverize your bread and eggs? I don't understand.
Posted by: Hilatron at March 13, 2003 09:12 PMLetting someone else pack your groceries is a lot like shipping something with UPS. There's no guarantee your bread's going to look any better than some of the boxes I've received. I guess we're just fortunate that nobody's managed to puncture a big hole in our bread yet.
Posted by: Josh at March 15, 2003 12:51 PMhi i would like to be a bagger and i am wondering if u you are hiring and if you are i am wondering were u are located thanks
Posted by: Tisha at April 19, 2003 11:59 PMUh...are you for real? Common sense points to a joke; the lack of grammar, however, indicates a potential lack of reading comprehension skills.
Posted by: Hilatron at April 21, 2003 06:53 PMI know I will be laughed off the page but it actually takes intelligence and a sense of geometry to make a GOOD Bagger. You have to be able to reason, and make pleasantries with strangers and all sorts of annoying people. So the values hold true for any position, you are looking for intelligence and a great deal of common sense. The dregs of the workforce won't do if you want to have or maintain customer satisfaction.
Posted by: Jaimie at June 8, 2004 03:26 PM